Friday nights are supposed to be spent with someone, I always thought. I call it “Friday night sickness,” the cure for which would be a bunch of friends for company, or, in the absence of companions, an impulsive shopping spree with lots of cash to spend. At one point in my life, I considered being caught dead alone on a Friday night as one of my greatest fears, next to my macbook crashing and not being able to have babies.

But I realize now, as I’ve been spending more and more Friday nights by myself, that it’s not so bad spending nights like this just being quiet, watching droplets of rain trickle down glass windows while cars pass by in the background like little bokehs, and listening to the hushed voices of lovers and friends chatting inside coffee shops.

It’s Friday night, I’m alone, and I’m in love.

In love with life, in love with NOW, in love with the promise of things to come. I want to remember these days, these Fridays I get to spend alone. I want to dry them up, like rose petals placed in between the pages of a hard bound book, and preserve them until they’re old and yellow and forgotten. And then maybe one day, accidentally or on purpose, I’ll come across these memories, remember how it’s like, and laugh at the silliness of it all.

Tonight I realize that I need to chillax and learn to not be so afraid of being alone.

(Thoughts that are too long for twitter. Posted from my mobile phone.)

Today they put up Christmas lights in our condominium’s lobby. And as I lingered in the lobby tonight on my way out to get coffee, I suddenly remembered my mom and how she shed a tear or two as we passed through rows of lanterns displayed along Ortigas extension a couple of weeks ago.

Christmas lights are evil. (I don’t know why I even thought of putting up those little light bulbs in my room.) They’re among the first indicators that Christmas is near, along with Christmas carols and the much-coveted Starbucks planners. And it’s sad, and torturous, to be reminded of Christmas.

Don’t you just think that Christmas is the saddest holiday ever? Or is it just me?

I think there’s something about it that makes people feel melancholy, inspite of the holiday rush and the shopping frenzy and the colorful wrappers and gifts. One picture of Christmas in my head includes children unwrapping their gifts in slow motion, while an old grey-haired woman sits by the Christmas tree smiling as her grandson opens his gifts. Kids run around with their new toys, couples kiss, mothers serve chicken salad, and little brother is by the phone whispering sweet nothings to the receiver; wrappers and ribbons and *cough* christmas lights are everywhere. And all of these happen at once in slow motion while “chestnuts roasting on an open fire” plays silently in the background.

Get the picture? It’s.. Sad. Like you just want it over and done with, get what I’m saying?

If I wasn’t blogging this thru my mobile phone, this is the part where I google and link back to that study that claims that suicide rates shoot up during the Christmas holidays, and maybe try to make sense out of this feeling I get whenever this time of the year comes by.

Don’t get me wrong. I like Christmas, and I acknowledge it to be the day in the year when we celebrate Christ’s birth, when we remember that salvation came to mankind in the form of the Father’s only Son.

And well, I love that I can spend nights like this with a good book while sipping Toffee Nut Latte, something you can’t do any other time of the year. (I just kinda wish they stop playing all sorts of versions of Rudolf the Red Nose Reindeer already.)

It’s just that.. I really think that it’s the most melancholy of all the holidays, Christmas, and I’m kinda wondering if someone else feels the same way too.

Any other human being who feels the same way? Pls. Let me know. Let’s have coffee and be sad together. My treat. I need 5 more Starbucks stickers.

[Posting with my mobile phone]

Originally titled “Blogging When You Feel Like It,” this is my third attempt at blogging with Nokia E71, the second one disappeared unsaved just a few seconds ago, but I refuse to be pissed off about it so I’m trying this again. :-p

DAY TEN. I’m one-thirds of the way through this 30-day thing, and while I didn’t really plan on taking a break between days 9 and 10, I’m actually glad I did.

Would I sound too self-consumed if I say I’m happy to know that someone actually noticed (for the second time) that I missed a day? I can’t help it! It makes me giddy finding out that someone, besides my mom, would bother to read and see how I’m doing with my 30 days. So thanks, Chinky, you made my heart swell with joy. :)

Also, to you who keeps on spellcheck-ing my posts, I’m really not that sure I know who you are, you see, I’m friends with a lot of grammar nazis — you know how birds of the same feather flock together — and I’m thinking, you can be anyone. So please say your name, so I can thank you properly for pointing out that I’m a human being capable of typos here and there. Lol.

I’m just happy to stay away from my laptop for a while you know what I’m saying? For someone who eats and breathes the internet every single day, whose demarcation line between work and play lies on browser usage (Firefox for work, Safari for play), it’s a breath of fresh air to shut off my laptop, spend a day with friends, read a good book, or sit through a chickflick that’s playing on Starworld while munching on french fries for a change.

And I know it does sound like I’m trying to make an excuse for failing to comply with my self-imposed 30-day rules, maybe I am. But siiigh, for this instance I just love the thought of failing, and breaking rules, and coming to terms with my imperfections, and then blogging about them. Awesome.

Meanwhile, the 30-day challenge is still on, and I can be sure that there will be some delays in the next few weeks, nevertheless, it shall be completed.

Man. Something about qwerty that makes me blog a handful. I stop nao.

30 Days of Awesome, 10/30.

Edit, two days later. Added links.

..is awesome!

DAY SIX. Wow. People can actually do this? :) Forgive my amazement, I came from two years with a Samsung E250, which I thought was kinda jurassic (it came with a Sun Cellular line so how can I complain?). I never really figured out how to use WAP on that thing even, but I’ve grown to love it just the same. After all, it served me well for two years and survived dropage (lol, is there even a word?) of various forms and ways, the last one being into a pail of water in my bathroom, before finally succumbing to death.

But that’s the E250. Let’s talk about this *cough*still-unpaid*cough* Nokia E71.

6/30. Blogging with Nokia E71

I’ve always thought I’m a Nokia person, though I happened to have tried a Sony Ericsson and a Samsung in the past. Woot, I’m back to using a Nokia now. :)

Truth be told, I’m a sucker for pretty-looking phones. Often, I’d choose one for its looks, not for its technical specs. I still currently have in possession a pink Sony z70i, which I only bought because it’s pink but never really got to use so much. Oh hey, i’m putting it up for sale btw. :-p

This Nokia E71, while loaded with awesome features, was actually a choice I made because I thought it was really pretty. I even waited for weeks to find the white version because I refused to get the black or the silver one. And mind you, it was not easy finding this. The white E71 had been out-of-stock for some time, trust me when I say I’ve looked far and wide, that’s why when I finally found one last remaining stock at some store in Megamall, there was no room for second thoughts.

And here I am now, feeling like I won the lottery for finding a cell phone that’s not only pretty but also a useful tool, considering my line of work. I love how I can check email anywhere, and read through my favorite feeds. And I’m loving the qwerty too. I didn’t think I’d have the patience to learn qwerty since my fingers have already become accustomed to the normal way of texting all these years, but now, qwerty is the way to go baby!

Lastly, I like being able to blog in a situation where it’s crazy — not impossible but crazy — to open a laptop, like in a cab ride such as this one. Why hello traffic, this one’s for you! The only worry I have now is if this thing has autosave, I think not, so this has to be posted on my first try.

Or else my next post will be about why mobile blogging sucks. :-p

In the spirit of being consistent with my 30 awesome things, I shall upload a photo to come with this post, later with my mac. Yeah, I’m OC like that. Ta-ta!

Edit, few hours later. Notes in parenthesis are added with my Mac. :)

Edit, some more hours later. Added a photo.

30 Days of Awesome, 6/30.